Do you start your day by waking up in peace, a sense that carries on throughout the day that "everything is ok?" Sure you sometimes have bad days or get into moods, but that happens. Overall though you're centred, in touch with yourself and/or God. Things are pretty good.
Or do you wake up with a general sense of dis-ease, a feeling that stays with you as you go about your day. It's a sense that "something is wrong" and "I have to do something to make it right."
I think we can read all kinds of self-help/spiritual books and listen to all the helpful preachers, but what we need, I believe, is not to "acquire goodness" from something outside of ourselves, but instead find ways to release the imprisoned splendor and goodness that already lies within our hearts. This may have been covered up or walled up by several things - an abusive childhood, failed relationships, unrealized dreams. But it is there.
At your core you are good and you are deeply loved. The question is how to get in touch with that core. 2 things come to mind. Time spent in quiet prayer and meditation, and building friendships with people who will continually remind you of your goodness and loveliness. It may take a lot of time to erase the old mental tapes of unworthiness or fear, but it can be done. A good therapist is also a great idea.
Nothing is wrong with you. You are good, loved, and lovable at your core.
Blessings,
Mark Andrew
